Lunch Date Musings

As I sat in a lonely corner of a restaurant waiting for a dear friend to meet me for lunch, I couldn’t help but feel a little idle. Here I was in the middle of the day on a Tuesday, sitting in a restaurant in my jeans, waiting.

Not waiting for a meeting.
Not waiting for an appointment.
Waiting to have lunch.
To chat.
To spend quality time with a friend.

As I gazed to my right and saw what obviously was an important, yet casual, lunch meeting, I felt a twinge of uselessness.
Like I was not being productive with my time in this very moment.
Like this was not a wise use of billable hours.
Like maybe I should have worn my office attire, lest a colleague mistake me for a carefree soul.

Thankfully, that moment didn’t last very long. Because I know now that I am worthy of rest. I am worthy of connection. And I am worthy of grace, extended not only by the judgments of others, but by the critic within.

In years gone by, I would have dwelled on those thoughts, and, chances are, I would have missed the very connection that I had carved out time in my schedule to make.

But today, I relished in the time spent alone, waiting for my dear friend. I sat with myself and smiled at the person keeping me company, the person that I have intentionally worked so hard to become. No longer a person who views productivity as a yardstick of worth, but a person who understands that the best measure of success often looks nothing like a suit and tie.

Success is never forgetting that hard work is a privilege, yet always remembering to make time for those dearest to us, including ourselves.
Success is the capacity to be truly present in any given moment.
Success is gifting kindness and compassion regardless of whether the recipient would do the same.
Success is the ability to reach out and to give love and encouragement to those around you, never expecting anything in return.

I left that lunch date feeling a little bit lighter and a lot more loved. The time invested in that friendship served me just as well as time that could have been invested in my practise. I rarely allotted time during the work week for casual meetings, but I have discovered that nurturing my interactions with loved ones has, in turn, brought a greater sense of meaning to my days.

While I am mindful that I have expenses to meet, I am now careful not to meet every demand at my expense.

And so I allow myself the freedom to sit in silence in the middle of the day if I need to.

The freedom to make personal connections instead of incessant networking.

The freedom to schedule pockets of time within my day to be more and to do less.

Most importantly, the freedom to walk away from the guilt that used to accuse me of being idle and of wasting time when there was work to be done, because I now know that the greatest work that I can do is to be.