Presence under the Tree

I hadn’t intended to write anything this week, but I really want to share what’s on my heart. 

It would seem that my newfound deference for intentional living has made a difference in my life, including how I have experienced this holiday season. 

Anyone who knows me knows that I have a childlike love for Christmas. There is something both magical and nostalgic about the lights, music and traditions that I absolutely love. Our local Christmas rhythms can be heard in my house as early as September and my tree is always up before October ends. One would think, therefore, that I would have enough time to truly take in and enjoy the season.

This couldn’t be further from the truth. 

For years the season would pass me by in a blur of flashing, snowflake-shaped lights. My Christmas traditions wish list resembled more of a wishful thinking list. I wanted to do it all, fearing that failing to continuously commit myself and my family to every invitation and event would somehow lessen the traditions that I wanted to instill in my little ones. The sad reality is that the only tradition that I was exemplifying was a tradition of rushing. A tradition of overwhelm. And a tradition of excess.
Excessive gifts.
Excessive commitments.
Excessive stress. 

This year I decided that I wanted my Christmas to look a lot different from times gone by, and I purposed to be very intentional about each commitment. The results have been astounding. 

As I slowed my pace while society seemed to enter into overdrive, I began to notice a stark paradox: in seeking to create a season that we and our loved ones won’t forget, we forget to season our lives with the very joy and peace that this holiday represents. 

I didn’t see it before, possibly because I was moving too fast. But now that my gears have slowed, this is what I have noticed:
There’s the urgent, then there’s the important.
There’s the obligatory, then there’s the lasting.
There’s duty, then there’s intention.
The focus is sometimes on expensive presents, but this is usually at the expense of presence. 

I’ve spent many evenings this holiday season sitting under the lights of our tree, taking in the scenes of my household. I am now completely convinced that there is nothing tangible that I can gift to my children that will evoke the same joy on their faces when I sit with them, listening to what they have to say and engaging in occasional tickle fights. There is no lovely Christmas tradition that we can create that can outdo a longstanding tradition of love. There is no present that can even come close to the gift of your presence. 

Don’t get me wrong: the process is an ongoing one. There are times when I still feel overwhelmed and stretched thin when I consider the things that I have to do. However, I have found much peace in leaving some things undone, and I’m slowly learning that if I don’t prioritize what I want for this season, there are many other people and things that will do it for me. 

So take the time to prioritize what you truly want, not just for this season, but for every day thereafter. Set your own goals for your life and for your family, no matter how counter-cultural they may seem. 

Set goals of intention.

And let one of your goals be presence under the tree.

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