Just before 1pm yesterday, the power went out at our house. My little love came downstairs to say that her teacher had just shared a long note in her virtual class and that she wasn’t able to access it. I promptly sent a message to another parent asking her to send a picture of the note from her daughter’s screen, but I was surprised to learn that she had no electricity either. Within a few minutes, we realised that the power outage had affected the entire island.
Little did we know that we would be without power for almost twelve more hours.
We made the most of the afternoon and evening. We sat outside to take advantage of the gentle breeze that blew, and we enjoyed much more conversation than usual.
When night fell, we still had no indication as to how long it would take for the power to be restored and so we lit our candles and prepared for a long, dark night.
The night was serene. As I looked out the windows, I could see flickering lights in the neighbouring homes. The stars were more visible in the dark night sky. I even caught sight of tiny red and green lights from a nearby drone. It was so dark that even the smallest light could be seen from far away.
No light could be hidden.
After some time, we finally conceded that we could no longer wait up for the power to come back, and so we decided to settle into the stillness and try to fall asleep. My littlest love, with a fresh wave of excitement, asked if she could blow out the candle that was in our room.
She asked her daddy to stand next to her as she blew it out, anticipating that with one strong breath, the room would become pitch black. The moment the air escaped her little lips and extinguished the flame, I was surprised. The room was not as dark as I had thought it would be.
I glanced around and noticed a soft glow. It gently lit the room just enough so that we could see. I looked out the window and saw the source of light.
Out in the distance, across a little river and an entire neighbourhood away stood a tall apartment building. The building itself was in darkness, but on the roof of the building appeared to be security lights. I don’t think that I had ever noticed those lights before.
I lay in bed and pondered how some small lights on a building far away could provide a soft glow in my bedroom.
No light could be hidden.
I was immediately reminded of a conversation that I had with a very close friend earlier that day. As we chatted, my friend revealed to me that she had struggled with self-doubt and that although she knew that she was already doing so much to share her knowledge and experience with her clients, she always managed to feel like she was less than enough when she compared herself to others around her.
I know how she feels.
I think, if we’re truly honest, many of us do.
I reminded my friend that the work that she was doing was powerful. It was necessary. And that the way that she shows up is enough. I know this, because the way that she shows up in her own life has inspired the way that I show up in mine. Her light may not be the biggest or brightest of them all, but it lights up her surroundings. And, even if she doesn’t feel it or see it, her light cannot be hidden.
I again thought about the lights on that building in the distance. I’m sure that there were many other bigger, brighter lights out there. But it didn’t matter to me. Those little lights didn’t need to be bigger, brighter, or even closer in order to illuminate my surroundings. They were enough. Their effects were far reaching. Just because they showed up. Just because they stayed on in the darkness.
I’ve been giving much thought to the things that I want to do and the ways in which I want to show up in my life. There’s something that lights me up from within and I yearn to let it shine.
But for doubt.
But for fear.
But for so many things.
But what if that light is enough?
Even if it isn’t bigger than the others.
Even if it isn’t brighter than the rest.
What if that light can be far reaching just because it shows up?
Just because it stays on in the darkness.
Many of us have that little light – that little or big something that we yearn to try or to learn or to do or to say or to have…
But for doubt.
But for fear.
But for so many things.
But what if that light is enough?
Even if it isn’t bigger than the others.
Even if it isn’t brighter than the rest.
What if we believed
that even if we can’t see it
or feel it
that we are enough
that our showing up matters
and that we need not compare our light to any others around us?
What if we believed
that in a world where people are constantly preparing for a long, dark night
we could show up
and shine in our own little way
and illuminate our surroundings?
What if we truly believed
that no light can be hidden?
Oh, Angelina,
How beautiful… this message, as always, illuminating and bringing such gentle consolation and assurance.
I can just hear your voice. And am grateful to have shared time last year with you and the beautiful beings surrounding you. Affectionate greetings to all.
…Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.
Genevieve, Thank you for this 🙂
I, too, am grateful for the time shared together as a group.
Let it shine, and hide it under a bushel no more!
It was a beautiful experience for all of us who were privileged to bask in Angelina’s light and illuminate each other. Robert Fulghum wrote about a piece of a mirror from a crashed motorcycle on the island of Cyprus which was occupied by the Germans during World War II. A piece of the mirror from the German motorcycle was kept by a child who polished it and played with it throughout his life. Over time he developed the habit of using it to catch the light and shine it into places. It amused him but one day he came to recognize it was the meaning of his life. To shine light into dark places. Thank you for your words and your insight always.
Theresa, this story sounds captivating and I would love to read more of it. We truly did illuminate each other in those group sessions. When we all gather together with our little candles, the collective light is without comparison. Sending you love always.